Fear, Focus, and Then Some

Change is inevitable. Change is Life. Change is Good. These are the things that come to mind when I hear the word change. Even as I sit here on this beautiful, slightly overcast morning listening to the birds chirping and sipping my coffee, I know that today will be different than every day before this and every day after this.   I especially know that what I choose to do today will affect everyday that comes after this day. My thoughts, words and actions, like a stone thrown into a pond, will create ripples in this world for years to come. So, what do I choose to do this day? And perhaps more important, what do I choose to change this day?   There is a saying that goes “If you keep on doing the things you’ve always done, you’ll keep on getting the things you’ve always got”. We all know this to be true, and yet sometimes we just can’t seem to make the change we know is necessary to get to the outcome we desire. Why is this? Why do we get “stuck”?   It all comes down to a matter of Focus.   Let’s say we desire to have a better relationship with a specific person in our life - our partner, our boss, a child, a friend. We decide we would like more openness, a greater level of intimacy, more fun and more time together.   In order for these new, enhanced, different feelings to exist, we must DO something different. We must CHANGE. We must either change what we do, what we say, or how we respond. And first - we must change our Focus. Where does our Focus come from? Our Focus comes from our thoughts.   Nothing in this world happens and no feelings exist without first being a thought in someone’s mind. The Golden Gate Bridge was first created in someone’s mind. There is no other place for it to begin.   Our thoughts lead to our actions, and our actions create the circumstances of our lives. Therefore, if we desire a positive, loving, fun, joyous relationship with someone, perhaps we have to risk being viewed as silly, crazy, weak and perhaps even vulnerable. Thoughts race through our minds. What if they don’t like me? What if I screw it up? What if the relationship gets worse instead of better?   These questions provoke thoughts of fear. They frighten us and immobilize us. They cause agita and grief. They keep us from taking action, and they keep us from what we desire.   The key to change without fear is focus.   It is asking empowering, positive questions. It is keeping your goal, the desired outcome at the front of your thoughts at all times without fail. It is never losing sight of your dreams. It is being vigilant. It is in expecting change, instigating change, and in fact, learning to love change that allows us to grow toward and become that which we desire.   To change without fear, we must recognize that fear is a thought that focuses on something that hasn’t happened yet and something that may never happen at all. Fear isn’t real. Fear is in our minds. Fear is a thought that we can control. To change without fear we must control our thoughts and our focus. We must release fear. In doing this, we can change and grow with ease.   Change is inevitable. Change is Life. Change is Good.   Now, that’s Powerful!

Sue Urda is the Co-Founder of Powerful You! Women’s Network and a two-time Inc. 500 Fastest-Growing Private Companies honoree. Her vision is to contribute to a global consciousness of women helping women succeed in business and in life and to expand Powerful You! by creating chapters around the US and beyond. Sue’s mission is to create venues for women to grow their businesses and nurture relationships, and to foster empowerment, gratitude and self-development. www.powerfulyou.com ~ sue.urda@powerfulyou.com